Friday, May 6, 2011

Catatan untuk mak


A Song For Mama lyrics
Songwriters: Edmonds, Kenneth B;

You taught me everything
Everything you've given me
I'll always keep it inside
You're the driving force in my life, yeah

There isn't anything
Or anyone that I could be
And it just wouldn't feel right
If I didn't have you by my side

You were there for me to love and care for me
When skies were gray
Whenever I was down
You were always there to comfort me

And no one else can be
What you have been to me you will always be
You will always be the girl
In my life for all times

Mama, Mama you know I love you
Mama, Mama you're the queen of my heart
Your love is like tears from the stars
Mama I just want you to know lovin' you is like food to my soul
Yes it is, yes it is, oh, yes it is, yes it is, yes it is oh

You're always there for me
Have always been around for me even when I was bad
You showed me right from my wrong
Yes you did

[ From : http://www.elyrics.net/read/b/boyz-iI-men-lyrics/a-song-for-mama-lyrics.html ]
And you took up for me
When everyone was downin' me
You always did understand
You gave me strength to go on

There was so many times
Looking back when I was so afraid
And then you come to me and say to me
I can face anything

And no one else can do
What you have done for me
You'll always be, you will always be
The girl in my life, ooh oh

Mama, Mama you know I love you
Mama, Mama you're the queen of my heart
Your love is like tears from the stars
Mama I just want you to know lovin' you is like food to my soul

Never gonna go a day without you
Fills me up just thinkin' about you
I'll never go a day
Without my mama

Mama, Mama you know I love you
Mama, Mama you're the queen of my heart
Your love is like tears from the stars
Mama I just want you to know lovin' you is like food to my soul

Lovin' you is like food to my soul, oh yeah
You are the food to my soul, yes you are

mother's day is around. usually my family did not celebrate this.tapi x salah rasanya pada hari ini aku nak bercerita mengenai mak aku. she's a lovely woman and she still is. her name given by the father is Siti Hawa but i'm not aware why everyone call he Esah, Esyah and my father even have pet name for her..Ecah( Now my niece, AISYAH YUSAIRAH inherit the pet name). she was born on somewhere in September 1942. She doesnt even have her birth certificate because of japanese occupation. thats why she cannot exactly remember when she was born. due to the japanese occupation, she was born with the features like the japanese. she has very fair skin and slit eyes. my arwh ayah always teased her a lot about her eyes.
My mother was born to the family of paddy planter. she only went to school for a while and have to stop schooling to take care of her younger sibling. she rarely talks about her life as teenager. I assume she doesnt have the life of one because she has so much responsibility and she was married at 16( i can even cook while I'm 16!).

Life with ayah is hard off course. Arwah ayah work as a POLIS HUTAN(now we call it
PGA). He rarely at home because of the nature of his work,going to jungle for few months and always not at home. I'm still amazed how does she manage to take care 7 of us single-handedly. I already feel at lost while having only three girls!
Mendengar cerita -cerita ibu miithali,selalunya mendengar ibu tunggal, tp mak, walaupun ayah ada, tetapi semua tanggungjawab kepada anak2 banyak pada mak. Alhamdulillah abg2 dan kakak2 boleh dikatakan semua menjadi "orang".

Sejak kecik aku memang manja, maklumla..nama pun cik manja. jarang mak marah,kecuali ponteng solat n benda jahat2 lainla..(malu nak sebut), mak memang jarang bercakap ksar,tinggi,menengking2 macam aku. mak memang sabar, jauh beza dari aku. mak rajin memuja tuhannya, aku cukup2 wajib ja..mak memang segala-galanya yang baik berbanding diriku. sampai aku dah 32 taun pun, sebut ja nak makan apa..tengah malam pun dia sanggup buat..teringat skali masa mengandung anak no berapa tah..dr kl, sampai kg dah tgh mlm,cakap kat mak nak mkn maruku mak.mak buat bertin2,dalam masa tu jugak..aku amik sekeping ja,pastu takmau dah..sory mak..betul2 menyusahkan mak...
masa aku g haji, tahun 2004, p dengan mak n abang sulung..aku dapat satu ujian yang cukup besar.mak,seperti mana org tua lain,memang lambat pergerakannya berbanding aku yg masa tu baru 25 taun,masih bujang dan kuat.aku jarang dapat tunggu mak kalau berjalan dengannya,slalu mak tekrkedek-kedek mengejar langkahku yang pantas.aku memang sangat selfish masa tu..sampaila masa kami nak pergi WUKUF..TABUNG HAJI dah bgtau jemaah kena cepat turun bawah lobi sebelum pukul 3,tp mak masih lambat siap,bubuh barang kuar barang dari bagasi. AKU INGAT MASA TU AKU MARAH SANGAT NGAN MAK, aku kata macam2 yang mengguris hati dan perasaan jiwa tua nya. apa yang aku tahu,masa tu bagi aku..mak lambat..aku hentak kaki kuat2,turun lobby bawah menanti meninggalkan mak ku terkulat-kulat di atas..akhirnya pukul5 br kami bertolak ke ARAFAH. Semasa wukuf,aku dah boleh cakap elok2 ngan mak. tp masa di MINA, satu demi satu ALLAH menunjukkan balasan aku berkasar ngan mak. Mula2 hari pertama melontar, 10 ZULHIJJAH, masa di bilik air, cermin mataku jatuh ke lubang tandas. aku memang meraba kerana tiada cermin mata.mujur abangku membawa spare,dipinjamkan padaku. Hari Kedua Melontar, walaupun aku begitu berhati-hati2, skali lagi aku menjatuhkan cermin mata ke lubang tandas..abg marah, mak menyebut jugak, eda ada buat apa2 ni..aku dah mula rasa gerun..Balik dari MINA, sampai sahaja di MEKAH, selepas berehat2, abang mengajak kami TAWAF DAN SAIE HAJI.masa nilah,UJIAN besar menanti aku..slalunya aku tawaf 7 x keliling kaabah tu kacang ja, tp aritu, dengan org bukan main ramai, walaupun aku juga bertubuh badan org arab, tp satu pusingan pun aku rasa xmampu, dadaku rasa dihentam cukup-cukup ketat sehinggakan aku tak boleh bernyawa..aku cuba sedaya upaya, mak dah mula menangis melihat keadaanku.akhirnya dah siap tawaf,kaki diheret jugak untuk SAIE.masa ni lebih truk lg.aku hampir saie dalam keadaan naik kerusi roda.mak solat sunat,mintak ALLAH mudahkan. akhirnya habis juga dalam masa 2jam, padahal sai'e bagiku slalunya xsampai 1/2 jam pun. Bla blk ke bilik, aku mengerang kesakitan,bernafas rasa bagai perkara plg susah dalam hidup.terasa betapa nikmatnya setiap nafasku selama ini. 3 hari aku xboleh tido. pergi jumpa doktor pun xboleh buat apa.mak xberehat langsung menjaga aku, siang malam dia menemaniku walaupun tarikh kami berangkat pulang makin dekat dan bermakna, waktu utk dia jemaah di Masjidil HAram makin kurang. Berendam air mata mak masa tu,org di malaysia taktahu kerana mak xnak ayah yang d malaysia risau. teteapi abg ada juga msg bgtau keadaan aku pda masa tu dan memang btul ayah sgt risau. Selepas 3 hari p kinik tbg haji kali kedua, dr cakap..adik ni tak sakit apa..mungkin urat kot, saya bg morphine injection ya, mungkin lepas tido ok.aku ngangguk je,sebab nak nafas pun susah,apatah lg nak bercakap.terasa betapa menyesalnya aku masa tu,kalau tuhan ambil nyawa masa tu pun,izinkan aku mintak maaf dulu ngan mak..lepas kena inject,abg hantar aku dengan kerusi roda ke bilik.aku tido dekat2 sehari jugak. alhamdulilllah, sihat dan sempat jugak solat di masjidilharam sebelum balik MALAYSIA beberapa hari lepas tu.

Peristiwa ini sentiasa menghantui aku, bila aku kasar,bg mak menagis,aku ingat peristiwa ni, macamana seksanya aku nak bernafas..apatah lg seksanya seksa di neraka nanti kerana menggugurkan airmata seorang ibu. skali lagi aku rasa sangat2 terhutang nyawa dengan ibu semasa aku bersalinkan MUNA, anak pertama. Sakit kelahiran yang digesa(INDUCE), siapa yang pernah merasai,tahulah rasanya.masa itu memang ingat ALLAH dan mak ja..sorry hubby,ingat jugak..tp mak banyak lagi..
Mak, cemana pun cek buat mak, cek sayang mak sangat. cek harap ALLAH akan ampunkan semua dosa mak, selagi mak hidup, ALLAH mudahkan segala urusan mak. Berkati hidup mak, Pelihara diri mak dari segala mara bahaya dan segala yang terbaik untuk mk. Selamat hari IBu mak. Mak adalah Ibu yang terbaik!Semoga ALLAh sentiasa memberkati mak!

3 comments:

noobie said...

wa ..that story in Mekah ..really that bad..aaa.How come I didn't realise dat..I thought it was just another semput kind of thing...he..he pergi dengan mak ingatkan kut..kut nak tolong mak kalau2 mak kena naik kerusi roda, rupanya mak kena tolak anak naik kerusi roda.

noobie said...

and btw you owe a pair of glasses:-)

aida abdullah said...

alo brother,dont read my blogla..haha..u embarassed me. nantila i ganti ur glasses ngan muna's glasses k.siap barbie brand lg:P

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